Is your toilet down in the dumps this Valentine’s? A loo-ser in love?
Tell us why your loo deserves to be with one of our loo-nely latrines, and if your proposition is the best you'll be twinned with your chosen partner - for free.
Add your propositions as comments underneath, remembering to include the number of the latrine your loo would like to twinned with!
Let us turn this:
Into this:
If your toilet is not currently engaged, we could have the perfect partner in one of these lovely loos:
Latrine number 1
From: DRC
The stern exterior can’t fool us; with a door that can be locked from the outside this the latrine enjoys practical jokes
Loves: Days spent lazing in the sunshine
Hates: Snakes and spiders
Favourite love song: I’ll Stand by Loo, The Pretenders
From: DRC
This attractive and well-built latrine pays great attention to detail (note the smartly designed ventilation hole) but knows that looks aren’t everything
Loves: The noise of rain on a tin roof
Hates: Lemon-scented air freshener
Favourite love song: Your Lav is King, Sade
From: Burundi
Shunned in the past for its non-traditional look, this latrine refuses to conform
Loves: Accessorising (especially with bamboo)
Hates: That boring brick look
Favourite love song: Love is a Loo-sing Game, Amy Winehouse
From: Burundi
The tousled hair-do hides a stable and dependable latrine that just wants to make someone feel safe and special
Loves: People who sing or whistle in the toilet
Hates: Bad hair days
Favourite love song: I Want to Wash Your Hand, The Beatles
From: Burundi
This latrine likes its privacy and spending one-to-one time with loved ones
Loves: Crafts, patchwork and interior design
Hates: Flies and mosquitoes
Favourite love song: How Deep is Your Lav, The Bee Gees
Let us know why your humble bog would be a match for any of these loos and your toilet could soon be:
Feeling at a loo-se end and would love to link up with Number 5 - I too love privacy and am a very crafty loo, my decor including images of sea creatures (some ferocious) to repel all bar the most desperate users...... we could serenade each other to my favourite tune (Bloo moon by that rock and roller, Elvis). Please say you will be my true loover
ReplyDeleteBrilliant! You're a winner!
DeleteCould you send your address to info@toilettwinning.org?
Also - if you like your certificate to be personalised? You can change the text in brackets: [This toilet has been] Twinned [by your name].
Congratulations!
Valentine's day sees the return of our daughter after a year working in Ghana. I know she would love to be friends with No4 as that fantastic hairdo would remind her of her husband's first attempt at cutting hers out there! After a year with a pretty primitive loo, UK bathrooms will certainly make them sing - and whistle. But she will never forget her love affair with loos like dear No4. I would love her to have a permanent relationship with the best of Burundi. Please see what you can 'loo' to welcome her home!
ReplyDeleteToilet in ramshackle Baptist church serving Welsh council estate feels outdone by posh loos in towering brick chapels built in heady Welsh revival days.Looking to get its own revival going by twinning up with latrine number 3. Decidedly Nonconformist in its theology,only a nonconformist life mate will do. Has own church ecogarden to cultivate bamboo ...
ReplyDeleteVery good! Latrine #3 picks you!
DeleteCould you send your name and address to info@toilettwinning.org?
Also - if you like your certificate to be personalised? You can change the text in brackets: [This toilet has been] Twinned [by your name].
Well done!
My Loo has a delicate dis-position and is loo-king for a loo-ver that can be relied on in times of difficulty and stress, with the folloo-ing attributes:
ReplyDeleteStrong constitution, sence of humour and a certain air about its presence.
Loo-ves: Looney Toons
Hates: Wind and pain
Favourite loo-ve song: " Are you loo-some Tonight?" Elvis
Lantrine No 1 is making all the right noises
Hello - you won with this brilliant response!
DeleteCould you send your name and address to info@toilettwinning.org?
Also - if you like your certificate to be personalised? You can change the text in brackets: [This toilet has been] Twinned [by your name].
Well done!
Number 2, its time for me to come out of the closet and declare that my lav for you is overflow-ing. Sometimes its hard to keep a float in this world of ours and a lot of ballcock is spoken, but I realise that its time to stop running and how I feel for you is no flash, or flush, in the pan. Forgive me for wax-ring so lyrical, in fact I’m filling up as I write, but I can see us seat-ed together, float-arm in arm. I was bowl-ed over when I saw your photo and whilst we may both be set in our ways, if U-bend and I bend, I believe we could be truly happy together - no longer loo-sers in lav.
ReplyDeleteHi Chris - this is such a great proposition, we just have to make you the winner!
DeleteCould you send your address to info@toilettwinning.org?
Also - if you like your certificate to be personalised? You can change the text in brackets: [This toilet has been] Twinned [by your name].
Well done!